Do you not perceive it?

The older I get the more I realize first hand that the Christian life is not always sunny and 73 degrees, but filled with storms and darkness. Its true that our faith in Christ has been designed by God to give us happiness in life and in heaven. Experience in life shows that sometimes the sun is concealed and sometimes completely cloudy with a 100% chance a rain. April is one of my favorite months of the year. It kind of reminds me of the season that I am in right now. "April showers bring May flowers." I feel like I am in a season of cloudiness with 90% chance of rain all the time.

I used to pity myself and these seasons, but as Charles Spurgeon once said, "trials make us dig deep and teach us what we are made of." What if there was never a season of rain..there wouldn't be a season of growth. I will say I enjoy the season of being in the light, feeling/being in God's presence more and walking in green pastures beside quiet streams. Its more fun than walking through the desert or tasting salt water rather than spring water.

From first hand experience I have noticed that I and every other Christian I have met do not always experience perpetual prosperity no matter what Joel Osteen says. Psalm 137:1-2 "By the waters of Babylon there we sat down and wept, when we remembered Zion. On the willows there we hung up our lyres."

Everyone has experienced the sweet surrender to Christ's shepherding when we first give our life over to Him. It seems like as a newborn He protects us from the cold winds,wolves, etc, but as we grow stronger in our faith we have to enter a more mature and rougher spiritual journey/experience. We need these storms to experience our faith, our roots have to grow deeper in Christ. The difficult days reveal the true value of hope.

Thus says the Lord, who makes a way in the sea. a path in the mighty waters. . .Behold I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert." - Isaiah 43:16,19

Whispers in the dark

I haven't blogged or written down my thoughts in a couple years, but writing down my thoughts during trials seem to help clear my mind. I always feel like it brings me closer to the Lord for whatever reason and is sometimes the only way for me to clear my mind. I honestly don't even know why I woke up and went to my blog this morning and I honestly still don't know what I am going to write about.

Reflecting back on this semester at Ole Miss with Cru,life and circumstances can change pretty quickly and change in a blink of an eye without notice. Why is it that circumstances always go good to bad faster than from bad to good? Life moves pretty quickly and over the years people that are put in my life seem to leave quicker than they arrived for whatever reason. Life seems to be shorter when a family member is diagnosed with a serious illness.

I was eating dinner this weekend in Destin with the Cru staff at Louis Louis and we started to share our ups and downs and the qualities we liked in each other and this came to my mind,

when going through trials one of the neatest things I have ever experienced in life are the friends that draw near to me instead of away. The ones that visit you in the hospital when your sick, the ones that call/text frequently, and take you out to lunch to South Depot when you hear news you don't want to hear and tell you/remind you that its going to be okay. Those friends are who I desire to be when things get tough in others lives. Those friends are the ones with the highest character, a character that I desire to have and there are really no words for how grateful I am for God putting them in my life.

This weekend trip to Seagrove was one of the greatest short trips I have ever been on. Something I desperately needed. There is something about God's creation (especially the beach) that refreshes my soul. It was humbling to hear what the staff team had to say what I meant to them and it was even more humbling to be acknowledged by the southeast cru region for desiring to launch Bridges International Ministry this fall at Ole Miss.



Doing ministry through the trials, loneliness, and depression has been difficult, but very rewarding. I often ask God, "how can You use a broken sinner like me?" I am not sure He has answered that question, but I am so glad that he does use me.


1 Thessalonians 5:16-18, "Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you."


One of my favorite and refreshing things to do at the beach is to wake up right before sunrise. I love everything about it. There is more oxygen in the air in the morning and you can't beat having the beach to yourself. The sound of the waves crashing, the breeze, and fresh air. I like to talk to Jesus early in the morning. I like to envision that I am one of the disciples walking with Jesus on the sea of Galilee and its my turn to be walking up front with Jesus and I can ask/tell him anything as we walk to the next city. Then finally finding the right spot after walking for sometime to watch the sunrise over one of my favorite places on earth.


Its being able to hear His whispers in the dark and knowing that these trials are temporary that keep me going. I am not alone in the loneliness,trials,depression.